Shame

Shame often arises as a result of feeling disconnected from others who are important to us and whose love we need to feel and share in order to feel safe and whole. This disconnection then manifests in the stories we tell ourselves of who we know and feel ourselves to be at the very core of our being. Shame is therefore a core emotional experience at the root of many responses to challenges with which an individual is confronted. One may very well find shame lurking around feeling states such as depression, anxiety, anger, guilt, issues concerning sexuality, etc. In fact, renowned psychologist and personality theorist, Silvan Tomkins, maintains that shame occurs when positive affects or feelings are thwarted, likening the experience of shame to the ubiquitous use of salt in the world in terms of its pervasiveness. Learning to identify the many ways shame may keep us in its possession, and then developing strategies to extricate oneself from the bounds of shame's domain, can allow one to move more freely and unencumbered through the world.

Anger

Anger is an intense emotional state that is often triggered by some sort of boundary violation: it arises when we are frustrated over being restricted or boxed in or if we feel someone has wronged us in some way. Our freedom to respond can then be effectively limited by anger's vicissitudes. Opening the space experienced in any given moment, (e.g., through mindfulness exercises), can provide the means to cultivate a range of responses other than anger's automatic knee-jerk rejoinder. The provision of such space can also help one to integrate the positive attributes of anger, (e.g., providing motivation to problem-solve), into the overall constellation of one's lived experience.

Guilt

Guilt is a feeling about something we have done or feel we have done. The feeling of guilt can eat away at a person like a cancer. Cultivating a way of being in the world, with simplicity and sanity, in which an individual feels one is acting from a place of integrity in one's interactions can help reduce the adverse effects of guilt's reach. Successfully working through feelings of guilt in therapy can also keep such feelings from progressing into more acute or chronic states characterized by depression, bitterness, and resentment. Alleviating feelings of guilt can also help mitigate the symptomatic expression of some obsessive-compulsive disorders.